Poster: March 2015

"I just stopped in to see what condition my Goozie was in"

Poster: April 2015

Dark Todd Day

White House Zombie Dust Drone Attack

 

PROTUS Beer Mail Raises Questions About Security, Freshness

WASHINGTON — In the latest White House security blunder, a Secret Service radar system failed to pick up a drone that crashed on the South Lawn yesterday. A White Spokesperson said the crash “Was a misunderstanding. Boris Thomas, operator of the drone and Chicago resident, used a highly unorthodox delivery method that caught us by surprise. No harm was intended.” Thomas released a statement shortly thereafter, “He’s the leader of the free world. I felt a duty to get him his beer as fast as possible,” Thomas said. “That shit fades quick,” he added.  The Secret Service said Thomas would not be charged with a crime. President Obama addressed the nation at 4pm and gave the following statement:

“I had exchanged several messages with Mr. Thomas and he was slow in responding to me over the course of the last several weeks. Apparently, he was in the Hospital and had no access to the countless messages I sent him. Then, today, a drone arrives on my lawn with the unwrapped six-pack we had agreed on nearly a month ago. Although he claims it’s fresh, my Chief of Staff informed me it is indeed 23 days old.  I had already sent him $60 worth of the latest DC Brau release, which I’m sure he has drank by now. I was also hopeful he would even throw an extra in... I guess in a way, he gave me a Space Station Middle Finger. I’m just glad nobody was injured. I look forward to putting this entire trade behind us and moving on.”

 

I love Lucy

Ricky

I Must Be Fire Retarded

SHIT HAWK DOWN

Derek: do not have any taste or smell anymore

Actual Craigslist Ad (Wadsworth, OH)

Forsale is a 6 pack f 3-floyds zombie dust. This is from my personal collection. I was involved in a bad golf cart accident and do not have any taste or smell anymore so there is no point of me keeping these beers. 

This can be picked up in zipcode 44281.

 i am open to offers. I can be reached at [REDACTED]

i have 2 6-packs of this to sell thanks for your interest as i was an ipa beer head but have no smell or taste anymore so i want to pass on the holy grail beers to someone else.

Zombie Dust Pep Talk

Welcome to the beer store. First, Thank you for forming a line out of our store this frigid afternoon. We are truly flattered. We’ve put a lot of work into the new flatbreads and pretzels and its nice to see you all leave work early to enjoy them. Secondly, today is a great day. Today is the day I get to inform all of you that there is no Zombie Dust bottle sale – although many of us talk over the phone frequently about how there is no Zombie Dust – today I get to tell you eyeball to eyeball. All at once. One giant gully gushing river of truth. So let’s just let that sink in…please, take a deep breath….andddddddd exhale. I’d like to thank each and every one of you for coming out today to stand in our parking lot. But before I let you go, out of courtesy, I want to clarify a few questions that very well may be swirling around in that little brain of yours right meow, OK?  Number 1: NO, I never had any Zombie Dust. Number 2: YES, that means I am a gluttonus back stabbing, lets not forget time wasting, petty liar. Number 3: Even if I had a few cases of Zombie Dust, I would rather commit unspeakable sexual acts with a ravenous gang of horny gypsys then sell any to you R-E-T-A-R-D-E-D A-S-S L-I-C-K-E-R-S. Sorry, I digress. Number 4: Today’s special is a lovely risotto beef soup for $4.99. So, that should just about do it as far as clearing up any confusion or anxiety you may be feeling right now so come on in and warm up! As a special treat for your patronage, we’ve dropped the bottle charge on Otter Creek Overgrown pale ale. I know how much y’all love pale ales.

Buh Bye

Mug Club Tour Party 2015

We are excited to announce this year’s Tour Party will share the event space with the Anish & Shimona Ruthrapathy wedding party!

Vintage Rocker Burl

Mug Club Book Club: The Adventures of Hunahpu Finn

Libations in the Windowpane

Of Mice and Brettanomyces
A fascinating tale of two home brewers, George and Lennie, who possess very few skills and resources that will help them attain their dreams of owning their own artisanal brewery in drought stricken California. Their journey is made even more difficult because Lennie is mentally retarded; his powerful body, his childlike innocence, and his fascination with teku glassess conspire against him. Their road to fame is mired with obstacles, among them lack of planning, cruelty, infected fermentation tanks, jealousy, fear, loneliness, health code violations and self doubt.

The Adventures of Hunahpu Finn
A coming of age tale of an underprivileged boy after he's been taken in by Widow Douglas and her sister, Miss Watson, who intend to take him to his first Hunahpu Day in the deep south of Tampa, FL. The boy soon sets off on an adventure to help the widow's beer mule, Jim, line up some Double Barrel Hunahpu trades in the free state of Michigan where Black Note stout is soon to be released at Bell’s General Store. The plot takes a twist when fake tickets and poor bottle distribution decisions doom Hunahpu Day leaving the boy, Jim and entitled hoarders Hunahpu-less. The book addresses America's painful contradiction of segregation and beer release parties in a "free" and "equal" society